Diary of a Working Mom

My Favorite Time

2012-01-11T23:17:00.000-08:00

My boys are getting older...the milestones keep coming and going and I try to take it all in, one of my favorite things to do is to put them to sleep. Last night, I laid down with both of them, cuddled with them as much as they would let me and we all fell asleep, I did not mean to fall asleep myself but...I was dead tired, I am sure many of you can relate.

My Brock gave me some "loves" before he fell asleep and I just about cried! There is nothing sweeter.

Sweet Dreams My Loves....

FOCUS....I SAY AGAIN...FOCUS

2012-01-05T21:18:00.000-08:00

I worry about EVERYTHING...when my kids get a cold, I worry they will have some crazy complication and end up in the hospital. I have said it before and I will say it again, I am nuts! Why? Who in the world knows!

I stress about my boys not looking at people in the eye when they speak to them, I worry about them not saying please and thank you...I am such a bad mom, my boys don't do this or that... I am already worrying about who Brecken will marry and if she will be able to get into dental school.. :) waaay crazy.

Tuesday, I get a call from the Children's Hospital, they want me to do a consult on a child who is waiting for a heart transplant. Little "C".... Great! Just what I need, a heart wrenching visit to PCH. I walk in and my stomach is already in a knot...I walk by all these rooms with sick, beautiful children and honestly, I want to start crying right then and there...but, I have to keep it together and look professional, right!

I speak to the attending who tells me this child has to be fed continuously for 10 hours because any stress (even from eating) can kill her and I am there to do a dental exam on a child that already hates doctors AND she has pain in her mouth. FABULOUS....anything else I need to know before I force myself in her mouth? Yes! (of course) there is not much you can do because she would not tolerate any kind of sedation for me to be even able to help her...WONDERFUL!

SO, I swallow hard before I go in her room, I turn on my charm, introduce myself to mom AND wake her up to do an exam...I need to repeat myself, YES wake her up to do an exam. I was happy that even though she did not feel like cooperating, she actually allowed me to do an exam! Hopefully, my recommendations will make her feel better but, as I was driving home, obviously feeling guilty about not being home to put my kiddos to sleep, I could not help but think about Little "C"'s mom and how much I am sure she wishes to "just" worry about her baby saying please and thank you, let alone who she will marry. My heart ACHES for her, I just wanted to hug her and tell her "something" ANYTHING to help her feel better but, what can you say? Absolutely nothing. Hopefully soon, she will hear "We have a heart for Little "C", let's do it! I pray she does and ask that you pray for it too.

My lesson, DO NOT SWEAT THE LITTLE STUFF, Focus on what IS important...hopefully one day they will say please and thank you and if not....well, you can always hope.

Happy New Year !!!

2011-12-31T23:23:00.000-08:00

Today, was a great day at home. Baking a little, cleaning a lot, enjoying time with family.

Ahhh family! Love my family, although today I got in an argument with my baby brother who I adore...I don't think he knows how much I love him... but, I just have a big mouth and say what I feel. Is that so bad?

Throughout the day, I have been thinking about this year that is coming to an end. As every year in my life, there has been good and bad and I am grateful for both. Yes, grateful for the bad because it has "hopefully", taught me lessons that will help me be a better person, better wife, mother, daughter and sister, hopefully I learned my lesson tonight....keep my mouth shut and don't give my opinion unless I am asked. Oh!!! that is just sooo hard for me!.... Maybe next year!! LOL

We celebrated as a family with the kiddos running around in the restaurant, fighting over balloons...my oldest brother was with us and that was special for us for many reasons.

All the kiddos and the balloons

My hope and prayer for you is that next year will be one full of love, joy and health for everyone! and for Greg and I, hopefully a full night of sleep soon, functioning on 3-5 hours of sleep a day is getting to me.

New Year resolutions for moi...be better at everything...as a wife, mom, daughter, sister aaand lose the baby muffin top, wish me luck because I WILL need it.

Love, love and more love to all!!!
ps. thanks for stopping by

Happy New Year !!!!

Not much overwhelms me....but

2011-11-28T10:28:00.000-08:00

It took about 12 shots to get this decent one!

Three sick kids though is more than I can bare! I am overwhelmed! Fevers, coughing, runny noses, oh my!!!!
I hate to admit it but, the older I get the smarter I think my mom is, she told me "you will never sleep the same after you have kids" she is right, always right! Who would have known!! :) she always has advice that I sometimes choose not to follow only to find myself doing exactly what she said ..... Eventually!

My thanksgiving was....full of snot, fevers and sleepless nights! Although this was not the most "fun" holiday, I wouldn't have it ANY OTHER way! Although overwhelmed and extremely tired, I am soo thankful for what God has so kindly given to me; His grace, my family, health and more love than I ever dreamt !

On a positive note, the Cowboys did win it for us this year!!!

Cowboy Fan #3

Cowboy Fan #2...and dad's hope for a football player

Cowboy Fan #1 and...too smart to be a football player! Helping mom with apple pie

I hope your thanksgiving was great, can't wait for Christmas, it is by far my favorite holiday, I am hoping for dry noses and lots of baking....but, I will take the dry noses if I have to choose!

Give thanks to the Lord for he is good!
Psalm 107:1

One of the saddest days of my life

2011-11-08T23:04:00.000-08:00

My cousin Abiel passed away two weeks ago on Saturday. He was 41, married to a great gal and had 3 children. He was diagnosed with colon cancer 2 years ago. He was soft spoken, kind, gentle, loving, a great friend, and a great cousin to me!

Again, I find myself wondering why... Again, not questioning God but just wondering why...

My dad called me and told me that he was not doing well, I felt that I needed to say goodbye so I called my brother and we flew to Mexico arriving around noon on Saturday, when I came into the hospital room my knees felt weak I kissed him and I just said... "I love you, more than you can imagine" he smiled a bit and nodded.

He is right in the middle, wearing a blue jacket. I am sitting on the floor on the left side with pony tails.

Church camp leading worship, he is the second on the left and I am in between his sisters.

We grew up together and spent many days enjoying time with all the cousins, we went to church together every week, went to camps together, took trips together, many, many fond and sweet memories. Spending time with my cousins was one of my favorite things to do growing up.

I could not leave the hospital, I don't know why? I felt I needed to stay...He was restless and I asked his oldest sister if she had sang to him (she has a beautiful voice) she said "No, I can't" and I said "Yes, you can" So, she began to sing, two of my other cousins and my brother were there so, we all sang. The last song we sang was "Amazing Grace"... minutes later he passed away. My dad called his time of death and said: "God gave, God took, may His name be blessed" We prayed together and thanked God for his life.

I consider it a privilege to have been there. Watching my uncle remove all the tubes and touching his face was more than I could stand, I hugged him and he said "I held him yesterday as a baby and now he is gone" "Love on your children and your husband because you just never know"

I know I will see him again one day and he will be handsome and smiling like he always used to do. For now, I will just love on my husband and my children because I just don't know.

My First Week Back at Work!

2011-10-14T14:37:00.000-07:00

Bennett Newborn

After I had Bennett I wasn't sure that I was going to be able to go back to work. I quietly cried myself to sleep the night before I went back to work thinking "How can I leave my baby?" I had prayed for so many years to be able to have a baby that I just felt awful leaving him. Obviously, I survived....he survived and so did Brock and now Brecken!

Three babies later and I still dread going back to work. That begins the day I have them! This Monday came and I did not cry but did feel my heart ache leaving her. I drove to work thinking about it and then I thought about it all day.

After being there for a few hours, I suddenly felt happy... then I felt guilty...because I was happy, what in the world!!? After thinking about it for a few days, it came to me. Making my children at the office happy makes me happy. It is a gift!! I do not by any means mean it in an arrogant way! It is a gift from God. Being able to do what I do and have the kiddos leave the office with a smile is a gift, having children tell me they want to be a pediatric dentist like me, makes me happy!

What is amazing to me is that it took me days to realize this! This gift is something that I love to do AND it makes me happy precisely BECAUSE I LOVE IT!

I know that I will continue to struggle to find a balance between being a "mom" and a "working mom" and I also know that I will feel guilty one way or another but, I am lucky that I am in love with both.

We all have gifts and most of the time we do not know what those gifts are but finding them will help you be happier even in situations where you feel there is no reason to be happy about, like leaving your babies behind to go to work.

Find yours!

xo, L

Brock Newborn

Brecken two weeks old

I Miss My Husband

2011-10-02T07:30:00.000-07:00

Being a mom is great. Greatest joy I have ever felt, greatest fear, greatest accomplishment, greatest worry...greatest everything but, once babies come into the picture your relationship with your husband changes. Having said that, I don't mean that it changes in a bad way, it is just different, you are both going in different directions, you do this while I do that, you clean the vomit while I bathe whoever is throwing up at the time. Always one going right and one going left.

I love Greg more now than I did when I married him, I love him, among many other things, because he is such a great dad. He loves on them but he is also tough which I think is good for them too.

But, my oh my!! I miss my baby. I miss our morning jogs, I miss our couch time, I miss movies, long dinners, trips, watching football together, taking naps...Oh ! I can go on and on and on...

I absolutely want to make sure that I do everything I can so HE knows that he is the only boy in the world for me.

As you know and I am kind of learning this as I go and as our family grows, it takes work to keep the fire burning...you get so busy that you don't realize that you haven't kissed or told each other something nice.....it doesn't just happen, you have to make it happen.

I have always loved football and now that the season started it is a great time for us...we don't sit on the couch to watch football anymore but, we have televisions that are strategically placed so we can play with the boys, color, read books and catch a little football. You do what you can!!

My Biggest Challenge....Yet

2011-09-21T12:04:00.000-07:00

Brecken will be 4 weeks old tomorrow! I can't believe how fast time has gone by...I love my baby girl, she seems so fragile but at the same time she is so tough already. Her brothers and cousins fight over her and pull her different directions and she seems to not mind. At least not now, maybe later?!

Having 3 babies 3 years and younger has been a challenge and I love challenges...but this requires a lot more of everything. More focus, more patience, more work, more energy, more sacrifice in many different ways and so much more.

My 3 treasures sleeping in the car

My struggle or challenge is being the best mom, wife and pediatric dds for my kiddos at the office that I can be. Finding a balance to do everything well and feel good about everything when I FINALLY get to bed. My problem is that I love my family and I love what I do, so it is hard to take away time or effort in any aspect of my life.

I did start my own practice so I can have flexibility and control of my schedule so, I am starting there, prioritizing everything so I can go down my list or try to...

I have written it before and I will write it again, women are amazing little creatures, stopping at nothing to care for their family and everything else!!

I learn from you guys every day. Thanks!!

My next post.... I MISS MY HUSBAND!!!

La Vie en Rose

2011-09-07T11:31:00.000-07:00

I am really loving being a mom to a little girl. More than I thought I would...Pink is pretty much everywhere now and I am really getting into it. There is just something about a little girl that just draws me to her.

Brecken is doing wonderful, she is the breastfeeding champ of the house by far, she is sleeping pretty well and is gaining back the weight she lost after she was born.

I am SLOWLY but surely, getting back to my computer to get some work done between naps, school pick ups and everything else and by everything else I mean....keeping Brock from killing himself and putting lotion, ice packs and whatever else I can think of on Bennett. Check out these pictures. I absolutely can not loose track of these two for a second!!

Brock's Second Bloody Accident!

Bennett's Allergic Reaction to what we think was
a mosquito bite!

Brock loving on his baby sister!
SO sweet!!!

So, as much as I hated pink before...it sure is growing on me now! Thanks again for all the emails, texts, gifts, cards and loves you have sent our way. It means the world to us!

Much love from us!

Time stands still

2011-09-05T12:54:00.000-07:00

I tried to prepare myself as much as I could for this moment. As always, it has proven to be useless. NOTHING can prepare you for 3 babies 3 and under. It seems like they are conspiring against Greg and I by not sleeping through the night...the 3 of them!

I admit, I am overwhelmed which is a lot for me to say because not much bothers me but...man, it is hard. I am sure it will get much easier and once our routine is established it will be much better but, it sure is a challenge.

Although I struggle with fears of not being the best mommy and wife that I would like to be, I try to focus on doing just that...trying to be the best mommy and wife that I can be. Time for me... stands still when I spend time with each of them, I treasure each moment, each smile, burp, gas, and everything else that comes with being a mom, I especially find sleeping time absolutely delicious with each of them...at this point they all want "mamma" to go to sleep and I will enjoy and hold on to that for as long as I can.

As overwhelmed, tired, sleep deprived and everything else...as I am, I would not have it any other way. I love my husband and my children more than words can say.

The boys are loving their sister and always want to touch her and kiss her...they get upset if she cries and tell me "Mommie, Brecken is crying!" I hope they will continue that for the rest of their lives.

Life is good...and it will be better as soon as I can get 3 hours of sleep at one time.... :)

My baby girl

2011-08-27T13:20:00.001-07:00

We are doing great! Of course a C-section is not a walk in the park but I am just so thankful Brecken is healthy!

I think she looks just like me... Poor thing! :) judging by a few attitudes she will likely be like me which is very worrisome!!! Oh well... Not much I can do!

My heart is full of joy and I praise God for this miracle in my life!

Will keep everyone posted, thanks for the texts, emails, cards, flowers... I am overwhelmed by the love that is around us!

Much love.... Brecken and mommy

Mommy...who is God?

2011-08-19T08:50:00.000-07:00

Bennett asked me this question yesterday morning while I was feeding him breakfast, before I could respond he moved on to his second question...Where does he live?....and before I could answer this questions he asked yet another question...Is he really big and is he everywhere?

How in the world do you answer these questions for a 3 year old? I have been thinking about what my answers should have been and I still don't know exactly what I should have said.

My answer went something like this...God is, everywhere...and he lives in the sky. He is very big and that is how he created the sun and the moon and then Bennett interrupted "did he make the ocean?" I said yes! He made everything...even you in my belly! You know what else? He loves you very much! His reply was simple...WOW! Then, he moved on to whatever he was doing satisfied with my answer.

I am still struggling with his first question, obviously I did not answer it! Who is God? Really, who is God for a 3 year old? I know who God is for me, My Father... my strength... my shield! I pray that soon I can help Bennett better understand and mostly experience Who God is in his life.

This is God making Bennett!

Phew!! Will there be more tricky questions like this? I can only imagine

Bennett's First Day of School

2011-08-18T05:59:00.000-07:00

It is unbelievable to me that my baby is going to school, I feel like I just had him, like he just took his first step.

I was nervous about many things including... no pull ups. We got up and he asked, "Mommy, are we going to school today?" I said yes!! are you excited? He said, yeah! Gave me a little relief since I was already having a little bit of anxiety about all this.

When we got there, a couple of little girls were crying and right away I noticed he was uneasy...I thought "here we go", we put his back pack and lunch box down and I gave him his last minute "reminders". I felt like I was in a football game and I was talking to one of the kids in the team before I sent him into the field...the battle field! His daddy was saying goodbye and I heard Bennett say something like...."I am not going to....and of course I thought....I am not going to stay here! Turns out he told Greg, "I am not going to cry" which obviously almost made me cry. I showed him where the legos were and off we went, against my will truthfully, Greg kept grabbing my hand and pulling it saying "Come on sweetie!" while I was thinking "Don't sweetie me right now, I want to make sure my baby is okay before I leave!"

Last picture I took before "sweetie" pulled me out of the room!

Three hours later and many "I hope he is okay"...We picked him up and he was smiling, happy with his little tail he had made attached to his waist...so cute! We did not have any accidents!! (huge relief) I could not feel any happier! He loves his lunch box and "his backpack". I bought him one he did not like so he uses his daddy's bike riding backpack (daddy is not happy about it ) It goes down to his knees, I think its the cutest thing in the world!

Daddy's Backpack

xo,L

Baby Number 3

2011-08-14T22:49:00.000-07:00

Many are shocked about baby No.3, I can honestly say not as shocked as Greg and I were. I did not expect to be able to conceive on my own, after 2 boys, I never expected to be the mom of a little girl and I never expected I would feel overwhelmed as I do now.

Don't get me wrong, I am absolutely thrilled, full of hopes and dreams and anxiously waiting for my baby girl to arrive! But I can't help wondering, why? Why does God think I can do it, what is his plan and why do I feel so overwhelmed?

I want to think this is normal but I just don't know. Maybe its because I have elephant hands, cankles and weigh just about as much as my husband, all of this is pretty depressing. Maybe its because my expectations of myself as a wife and working mom are so high. But, how can you not have such high expectations of yourself when you are dealing with such precious individuals? I don't know.

I do know that, God is in control and I don't have to know the answer to every question (although that would be nice, I almost have Greg convinced that I do /;0). Bottom line for me is to trust Him and not myself or what I think I can and can't do. I know it will take me a little while to figure it out but, I will...eventually....one way or another. My mom said to me "you don't think about it, you just do it"! So, that is exactly what I am planning to do.

Tomorrow Bennett is going to school for the first time, I obviously am more nervous than he is...and I worry about every possible thing that can go wrong. I guess we will find out tomorrow and I will blog about it...I am excited, my baby is going to school!

xo,L

Brock loving on mom and baby sister

Potty training...I give up

2011-08-07T08:45:00.000-07:00

Bennett is starting school in 1 week, I have been trying to work hard on potty training and I am not being very successful, I have to say I am frustrated and after changing underwear 3 or 4 times in only a few hours, I am mad. I shouldn't get mad, I know... and I don't tell him I am but.....Come on!

We have #2 almost under control and we have improved on #1. I guess you just keep trying right?
Is it that he is not ready or I am just not doing a good job? Brock is already wanting to seat on the potty chair, hopefully he "gets" it faster than his big brother.

On the other hand, he is so bright, he is starting to read, knows more dinosaurs than I do, can speak English and Spanish, knows his numbers and overall I think is brighter than I ever was at that age. I am suure, I didn't know about planets, oceans, states and capitals at 3. This worries me too since he told me the other day..."whatever mom, it's my life" Okay, where does a 3 year old get this from? I can only imagine what he will tell me at 6,12 and of course 18. Oh man! Scary !!!

Okay, I shouldn't complain...right?

This is a video of him at 2 saying the Pledge of Allegiance...his daddy is a patriot so he made sure his baby starts learning at an early age! Enjoy its really cute!
ps...he did get his teeth brushed after the milk.... :)
xo,
L

Why do bad things happen to good people?

2011-07-12T07:53:00.000-07:00

I have ALWAYS asked myself that question. Why would GOD let this happen to ...so and so...
I don't understand it yet.... and probably never will.

Once I heard my dad say that seeds need to die to bare fruit...meaning sometimes pain is necessary in our lives to grow, to appreciate and to be thankful.

Sunday, I saw one of you at church and going through difficult times...I cried with her and I have prayed for her. In her sadness though there was joy, she even said this is was an answer to prayer! Imagine that!!

I do have to agree with her, going through difficult times brings you to your knees and you realize many times, it is me, myself and I and until that time you know that everyone in your life may fail you but God...and it is wonderful to realize that He is always there, in good times and bad.

As I listen to my boys scream together as I work on this post I can only say...I am so thankful for everyday and I pray that if I ever have to go through difficult times I can find joy knowing God is with me and will Never leave me.

Thank you my friend for reminding me that finding joy in the midst of difficult times is hard but, not impossible!

xo,L

Very Happy!!

2011-07-02T15:07:00.001-07:00

I am very happy to share that Lisa (Dr. Bienstock) is joining the practice. I have been looking for someone special for a long time and I believe I have found her. We are both very much alike in many ways and I think you are all going to love her. My only concern is that you might love her more than you love me!? :)

Anyway, we are working together to continue to make sure that you are always taken care of and loved. I feel she will be a perfect fit and I am thankful and excited to have her in our practice.

We will be having an open house for all the moms out there on July 23rd and we hope to see you there. More details to come!!

Have a safe and happy 4th of July. I have said it before and I will say it again. Although born and raised in Mexico and obviously proud of my Hispanic heritage, I am so proud to also be an American. I love this country and what it stands for.

God Bless you and God Bless America! Land of the free and home of the brave!!!

xo, Lidieth

What do you love the most about your kids...and your husband?

2011-06-28T08:31:00.000-07:00

As I try to take it all in...having a 3 year old a 1 year old and a baby girl on the way, I try to enjoy the little things each of them brings to my life.

My Bennett's independence is flourishing, he wants to eat by himself, bathe himself and many other things, initially I was sad but, I love that I see that in him and pray that he becomes a strong, independent individual that can accomplish any goal he sets for himself.

Brock is very strong physically and has a strong will like his mama...he is starting to really show when he is not happy about something and sometimes I don't know what to do about correcting that (hitting his brother)!! Although I don't like it, I do...I want him to be strong and courageous, stand up for himself and others. He is such a lover though! I can't get enough of that!

My baby girl is growing well and I just love dreaming about her life...will she be mellow like Greg or crazy like me? Will she look like daddy and his brothers or more Mexican, like me?

My husband, the love of my life, my one and only love is...everything to me. I just don't know what I would do without him! We try to spend a few minutes talking and making out before bed (that is hugging for a few minutes and kissing on the lips). How is that for making out?

My life is about to get a little crazier and I just want to enjoy it. One of you guys said to me, "Long days, short years" and you are so right so, I decided that even if I have an awful day I will be thankful and enjoy the little things that are so precious.
Thanks for letting me share and have my therapy for the day! Have a great one and God Bless!

My strong willed child and his very mellow dad!

Bennett having a little fun.

xo, L

2011-06-27T08:38:00.000-07:00

Love having pictures taken of the boys. Carrie does a great job and somehow always manages to get some good pictures of the boys. Every time we see her I am amazed she can even get them to look at the camera. Let alone smile! Enjoy!

Brock is one year old!

2011-06-02T06:35:00.000-07:00

My baby boy is one year old! Wow... time flies! I am always amazed at the love children bring into your life and how much richer it is because of them. I try to just take it all in, even when there is chaos... which it happens quite a bit around here with 4 boys running around.
I just enjoy the precious time God has given to us with them and treasure the blessing and tremendous responsibility it is.
As I wait anxiously for my baby girl I can't help but dream about what she will look like and what she will be like. Although I worry about it all, I can't help but be full of excitement for what God has planned for us.
Take a moment to take it all in...look at your babies.... enjoy and be thankful!

Life is full of surprises ....and lessons!

2011-05-25T05:23:00.000-07:00

First, an apology. I have been so busy for so many reasons I have not had time to sit at my computer and blog. It is crazy to think that you don't even have 5 minutes to do this but, I am so tired at the end of the day that I just want my bed. So, here I am again. Let's keep sharing....

I am a planner and I don't like surprises. I want everything under control at my office at home and with my kids...and husband :) I guess you can call me a control freak. My sisters and brothers all agree I am simply a freak!

God amazes me as he always has these funny ways of sharing little secrets with me like....You are not in control! I should just write it 1000 times and see if that helps. I just have to understand, accept and KNOW that I am in control of nothing. He is in control of everything and against all odds I am pregnant...AGAIN! Yes, ladies.... again., Yes, I am crazy, Yes, my babies will only be 14 months apart and YES! ......I do know how this happens I just thought it never would without the help of my reproductive endocrinologist.

It is just hilarious to see your faces when you come in the office, look at me then the belly and say "ARE YOU PREGNANT.....AGAIN?! I just love it !!! So, I guess I am not busy enough and now I have to get into pink, dance, princess stuff and all because IT IS A GIRL!

So, stay tuned this is about to get a lot more exciting and scary at the same time. I can only say God is soo good, His will is perfect and I am totally happy (after a few...ok, more than a few tears) with the idea of having a little girl to raise and love...and fight with when she is a teenager. I can hardly wait.

My boys are growing so fast!

3 boys that I adore

Thanks for visiting
xoxo, L

A great day!!

2011-02-16T20:50:00.000-08:00

Today, I cried quite a bit. Happy tears... I was working at the hospital and I got to witness a lot of miracles happen. This family was one of them, watching the parents look at their baby after her lip was corrected was priceless!!! I took a little video, I can't post it from my phone but will later! It's a must see.
What a day!!! A beautiful and blessed day!

A new day is starting

2011-02-16T07:47:00.000-08:00

Last night, my boys were not having a good night... Bennett kept asking me if we could go home. As I was laying in bed after they finally went to sleep I was thinking to myself " why am I doing this to my kids?" and I was feeling pretty awful. This morning my mom was telling a story about her bringing us to mission trips except my little brother almost died from it and she asked herself the same question, why am I doing this to my kids"???
Now she says she is glad she did it because we all love to serve and love God and that is exactly what I want my boys to do....love God, serve Him and serve the people around them that need it. So, I will keep on doing it, it is worth it!!!!
Again, it is more blessed to give than to receive!!!!

The little things

2011-02-15T20:00:00.000-08:00

That mean so much !!!!

Juanita

2011-02-15T19:58:00.001-08:00

Isn't she a doll?

Day 2

2011-02-15T19:58:00.000-08:00

Today, We worked at a church that is about 300 years old. It was beautiful and a beautiful setting for us. We saw about 40 patients and gave out lots of toys, balloons, nail polish and more. It is so much fun to do this it's hardly work. Although i will admit my feet, back and neck kill!
The highlight of my day was a patient I translated for on Sunday. Her name is Juanita and she is 8 months old. She has a cleft lip and palate that was corrected today...she was beautiful even with the cleft and after the surgery she just looked like a little angel. ( I will post the post op picture later after I download my pictures. )

God gives us gifts and talents, the question is, do we use them? Many
times I considered becoming a surgeon because I felt like I could "really" make a difference in people's lives but the reality is; it doesn't matter wether you can fix a cleft lip, pull an abscessed tooth or paint little girls fingernails, it's all about actually doing it and changing lives... Including ours!!! Because BELIEVE me, it is more blessed to give then to receive!
Stay tuned!!! And thanks for stopping by!
Count your blessings!!!
xo,
L

No shoes

2011-02-14T21:01:00.001-08:00

How many in our closet..... Me? TOO MANY!

2nd day!!!#

2011-02-14T20:58:00.000-08:00

We visited one of the villages today! We pulled teeth right outside this classroom of 1st graders!!
They had a Blast looking at what we were doing and the stuff we gave
them.
I can only say that I consider it a privilege to serve these people, they teach me soo much.
I love this work... It is frustrating because we take so many things for granted.

Today, I feel thankful.

Untreated cancer#

2011-02-13T21:16:00.001-08:00

We had 3 patients with cancer today, heart breaking!!!! No other doctors would touch her!!!

More pics #

2011-02-13T21:13:00.001-08:00

Beautiful girl with congenital defects..
I will try to get a post op after surgery!#

First Day#

2011-02-13T21:10:00.000-08:00

We began working today, our trip yesterday was long and hard. My boys were Incredible!!! Thank God!!!
First days are usually consults and scheduling surgeries, we weren't expecting dental patients but had plenty. Worked with plastic surgery and will do some cases this week with them that require some dental work.
Lots of sad stuff will post more pics later....what a reminder of how much we have and how little we need.#

Who has some good advice to share

2011-02-09T13:00:00.000-08:00

HOW....HOW...HOW....do women work, have a family and keep their sanity. Even if women don't work, so much to do and think about. Blows my mind that some of you even home school!!! HOW!

Okay, any good advice on how to keep it together and actually be able to get ANYTHING done?

As I am preparing to go to the mission trip in Valladolid, I am trying to keep it together...make sure everything is ok in my office, that all questions are answered and everyone has projects to complete while I am gone.

Packing for 2 kids, a husband and medical and dental supplies to see 500 patients or more..I have to admit that I thrive on being busy and having things to do...but, I am a bit overwhelmed.

I am soo excited about the mission trip I wish I could take every single person I know, once you do it...you are hooked for life and it changes you in so many ways.

Soo...please stay tuned, I will share as much as I can as we go...

Mommies

2011-02-04T18:10:00.000-08:00

I got done early today after taking care of 2 kiddos that needed emergency care, I love what I do and I am so glad that I am able to help children in some small way. So, it was a good start of the day for me...the rest of my day was even better because I got to spend it with my 3 boys.

Today, as I was out and about with my boys, I watched several women interact with their children,
it always amazes me to see the love and tenderness a woman exudes. There is no greater love than God's love but I truly believe that the love of a mother comes second. No offense to dads...but, when I am sad, sick, dissapointed. I WANT MY MOM, don't you?

So, pat yourself in the back once in a while mom for that unwavering love you give to your children, the unselfish sacrifices you are willing to make and the tenderness that you exude when no one is watching (or when you think no one is watching). Because it not only makes your children's day but, someone elses day, like mine.

Something I LOVE to do...

2011-01-30T21:54:00.000-08:00

Medical mission trips are something I have always loved to do. My mom and dad have been doing them for as long as I can remember. That is where I found my interest in dentistry. I really wanted to be a surgeon like my dad and because of it I got to see a lot of surgery by the time I was 6 years old. I would stand on a wooden box, next to my dad and hold, cut, retract and at the end of the procedure I helped wash the instruments and sterilize. This was done in make shift operating rooms that we set up in school classrooms! It seems crazy but it was just normal everyday things for our family. Going on mission trips was fun, exciting and we got to do a lot of exciting things.

One time, my dad told me; "Why don't you go with the dentists and ask them if they would let you pull some teeth" Of course, I thought it was a great idea! My dad just wanted to keep me out of the OR for a vaginal procedure the OB's were doing. So...I went and one of my dad's good friends said, "Sure, I will let you pull some teeth" at the end of the day, I had about 6 rotten teeth in my pocket to show to my dad. I was pretty proud of myself. I showed him the teeth and he said; "maybe you should be a dentist" and that is when the thought crossed my mind for the first time, I was 6-7 years old and I remember it as it was yesterday.

I have probably been to as many as 40-60 medical mission trips all over Mexico throughout my life, some in towns up in the mountains in the middle of nowhere, some in jungles with heat you wouldn't believe and more mosquitoes than I care to remember! Every single trip, I loved!!! I love helping people, I love to love them...and it is my hope and prayer that my boys have that same passion and love to help others.

Soooo, in 2 weeks we are heading down to Southern Mexico for another mission trip and I am taking the boys. This will be Bennett's second mission trip, he doesn't know it but he will soon enough. They will see other children with no shoes that die for a balloon or a ball! He will also see children with cleft lips and palates that have not had surgical corrections, children with burnt hands and faces that never got treated! I want them to know how blessed they are!

So, will you join us in our journey? I will post everyday as we go...and let you know how it is going! I will post some pictures of our bags of supplies so you can see how it all works. Please pray for a safe and productive trip for our group coming from Arizona but also from all over the United States. Pray that lives and hearts are touched and that all the glory goes to Him.

Thanks for checking in, I will keep you posted!

xo, L

PS...Don't forget to post your love stories ladies!!!

This is how we do our exams... with an audience! Here is the dad of a friend of ours that came to help from Florida, Greg behind him and my mom helping translate.

This is one of our mission trips in the 80's , one of my most favorite trips, 1 month before I started dental school.
My dad in the front, my sister in red, my mom behind her and me behind my dad with other friends.

This is our makeshift consultation areas...Fancy huh!!

I will keep posting more pictures as we go!

My Love Story

2011-01-25T22:32:00.000-08:00

We all have a "Love Story", mine is nothing special but, I want to share it in hopes that you might share yours with me. Why? because next month we will be celebrating Valentine's Day and we want to help you celebrate it by sending you and "the love of your life" to a date night. Dinner at a nice restaurant, a movie and child care. Remember!? like you used to do before you had kids?!

Even though, I can't wait to read your love stories, my purpose is to remind everyone, myself included, why this man is so special to you. SOoo, after you write your story, write why you love him so much and why he is so special to you and then don't forget to tell him. Thanks for sharing.

xo, L

I moved to Connecticut to complete my training in Pediatric Dentistry. We spent the first month taking a crash course on Anatomy and Histology. During this time, all the residents from different programs took these classes together. That is where I saw Greg for the first time. He came into the conference room wearing shorts and sandals and I was appalled. I thought how dare he come to class like that, he is a doctor! My dental school was very conservative, all the boys were required to wear pants and sometimes even a tie for class so needless to say I was shocked.

Our first conversation didn't go so well either, there was an ice-breaker exercise and I got Greg's name (I did not know it was Greg at the time). I really didn't feel like doing it so, I just spoke to my fellow residents and waited for the exercise to be over. After it was over, the teacher asked if everyone had been found and I thought "There is no way that whoever I got will say they weren't found" Sure enough he raised his hand. So, I Had to walk over to him and talk to him for a while. He was not that nice... so I liked him even less.

He would sit in the very back of the conference room everyday with his buddy and was not that friendly, when we were preparing for our final Anatomy exam, we were in the lab working on heads and studying. He came into the lab and starting going to every table and looking at the head for a while. Finally he got to my table and when I looked up, I smiled...why? I don't know but, he looked at me and turned around and left. I disliked him even more.

To make a long story short, we both passed our classes and that night after getting our scores, I got a call from a friend inviting my roommate and I to go out for dinner with the rest of the residents. I asked who was going and "Greg Libby" was on the list and I told my friend, if Greg Libby is there I am not going, I hate that guy! He was interested in my roommate so he insisted until I agreed. We show up and who sits in front of me? The infamous, Greg Libby and I just about died...I thought "I am staying for dinner and I am out of here!" Pretty soon, he starts to try to talk to me and he was actually pleasant and then we all went out dancing and he could actually move so I thought, I can hang out with this guy! We can be friends. Did I mention I had a boyfriend I had been dating for 5 years?

Needless to say, I broke up with my boyfriend and began dating Greg immediately. We were engaged to be married 13 months later and were married 2 months after that in Connecticut. We had no money so, Greg made my engagement band (no diamond) with scrap gold from the dental lab and we borrowed his friend's ring for the ceremony with the justice of the peace and bought his ring later.

I love Greg because he is the most unselfish person I know, he cares about us more than himself. He always is kind, gentle, loving, trustworthy, supportive and loves me with all of my flaws (and they are many). He is the best father in the world, and although he is very loving with his boys he is also tough. He loves the Lord and that makes me love him even more.

I love to spend time with him, he is truly my best friend. I also happen to think he is the most handsome man in the entire world... I am the luckiest girl in the world!

Another Beautiful day in Arizona!!!

2011-01-15T16:15:00.000-08:00

Enjoy outside it is just gorgeous!

Please don't do it!

2011-01-12T21:14:00.000-08:00

I know it is tempting to see these snacks on sale...the kids love them, some parents too, they are cheap, will last a long time because it is a huge "barrel" and on and on.
I am asking you please don't do it. Resist the temptation!!! This is one of the worst snacks we can give our kids.
Just say no my friends and if you already bought one give it to your hubby to take to the office or bring it by the office and I will trade you and give you a Starbucks card! Deal?

xo, L

2011 Happy New Year!

2011-01-07T20:43:00.000-08:00

It is a new year which means new year resolutions...change, out with the old in with the new.

I am sure many of you have all this year planned out, not me. I don't want to stress about it. Not yet anyway! I do have a lot of changes coming to our office and I am very excited about it!

For now, I wish you and yours a year full of health, joy and all the blessings from above.

xo, L

Leg warmers are back!

2011-01-07T20:14:00.001-08:00

This was a test. Sometimes I want to post something from my phone and I had not been able to figure it out until now.... this is so cool.

This is...I am not sure Hannah Montana or iCarly or one of those girls from the Disney Channel during the Disney parade and I noticed she was wearing leg warmers, so I took the picture from the tv.

Never in a million years would I have ever imagined that LEG WARMERS would make a comeback.

Too Funny!

Christmas Day at home

2010-12-25T07:37:00.000-08:00

Christmas is a very special time for me, wonderful memories of time spent with family and friends, my parents always made it memorable.

I want to make it special for my babies too so, gearing up for Christmas we made cookies (not as many or as nice as I would have liked), chocolate covered pretzels (something Granny used to do but since she passed away a few months ago, we continued her tradition), we made Christmas cards for our family and friends (with blood, sweat and tears as you will see), had dinner with family and friends we love as family and we opened presents. Bennett got a Buzz Lightyear but to my surprise the $5.99 electric guitar was the hit...so much for the fancy toy, although I got a good deal!

We visited Sunshine Acres and brought pizza and brownies for the kids. We brought the donations we collected at the office, it was fun and sad at the same time. Seeing children there without parents to love on them broke my heart. We plan and save and dream about how our kids' lives will be and these children have no one to do that for them. Hopefully their hope is in God, He will never fail them.

More than anything we spent time with family...I did not have that for many years so, it is a real treat to have them around and to see my boys hanging out with cousins...is priceless. So, I put together a little video for the family and I thought I would share it with you my friends...Obviously not a pro...but enjoy it anyway! The pictures at the end are a few of the pictures we took to get "one" for our Christmas card...it is always fun to try to get the perfect picture!

Christmas Eve

2010-12-24T20:59:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve service at our church was special. The music, the message and at the end the candle lights...Greg took this picture and I thought it was beautiful because it shows the light in darkness.
Jesus came to bring light and eternal life.

For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior,

which is Christ the Lord. Luke 2:11

So much to share and so little time!

2010-12-23T08:59:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is my day off. As every one of my days off, I have a to do list. Let's see if I can get through it... funny...get through my to do list!!!! :)

Updating my blog is on my to do list. I can't wait to share Christmas and what God is doing in my heart.

Our Christmas was wonderful and I hope from the bottom of my heart that yours was blessed as well!

A Rainy Day in Arizona

2010-12-16T13:27:00.000-08:00

Every time it rains and I am at work, I look out the window and wish I was home with my kids and we could grab a blanket and read books or watch a movie. Today, its raining, I am home with my kids but we are not watching a movie or laying down reading books. I am trying to work on my "stuff" but I can't, instead I am getting some therapy (blogging), pacing around my house going from one room to another where my boys are sleeping. Checking them for fever and listening for coughs or yet another vomiting session. I am sad, maybe I feel worse because its a rainy day and I don't get to cuddle and have fun.

It is gorgeous here when it rains...I absolutely love the desert.
I need a vanilla latte, maybe that will make me feel better.

Hope your day is a beautiful one.

xoxo, L

Oh! I am so stressed out!

2010-12-15T13:08:00.000-08:00

My baby wanted an ice pack on his head...

Bennett has been sick since Sunday, that alone is enough to make me want to cry...my to do list is soo long I won't even look at it right now.

Felt better for a few minutes
we went outside to play

I thought today, being my day off I would have "some" time to get some work done while the boys took naps. FUNNY!!!.... Instead, I cleaned vomit and changed outfits and sheets 5 times too many! Hopefully today was the worst day and tomorrow he feels better. I am thankful I got to be home with him all day...still at this moment I can smell the vomit on me! The joys of motherhood, huh!

Speaking of the joys of motherhood ladies... NOBODY warned me about this...not my mom, not my sisters or my best friends, not any of YOU moms that come to our office. Everyone said how wonderful motherhood was.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?

Sleepless nights, worrying about them being sick...worrying about everything from feeding the baby to thinking about college and even worrying about who they will marry because of course I am crazy and I already think about it.

My mom did say "you will never ever, sleep well ever again". She was right, I can not think about one time where I have gotten up to drink water or go to the bathroom without checking on my boys...or just getting up to check on my boys, what a life! A slave to your children...but oh! what sweet slavery...isn't it?

Last night as I was changing Bennett after being sick he said "Mommy, I think I love you"...melted my heart, I will change 1000 outfits and 1000 vomitted sheets for him anytime. The love I feel for my boys is so deep! I could honestly do without the worrying but since it comes with the package of being a mom, I will take it and be sooo thankful for it. Our babies...one of God's greatest blessings to women, aren't they? Thank you Lord!

Decorating my house for Christmas (not checked)

Christmas presents for my family (not checked)

Finishing office stuff (definitely not checked)

Christmas Cookies (not checked)

and on and on....and on.

Tell me about your day... thanks for visiting!

xoxo, L

My Greatest Fears and how I "try" to overcome them.

2010-12-03T00:46:00.000-08:00

As I have said before, I am a "crazy" mom. No.... lets try that again, I am the President of the Crazy Mom Club. I am over cautious and completely paranoid. I worry a lot and think about the "what if"...even more.

My greatest fears are my children or my husband becoming ill or someone taking them and hurting them. Obviously, there is nothing I can do about them becoming ill, that is in God's hands, we pray every night for their health and safety among many other things but, you just don't know. I will be blogging more on this topic soon....

Like many, I try to feed my boys a healthy diet, I limit sweets a lot although my oldest has an obsession with any and all chewy candy, courtesy of the Libby family. Some days are better than others.

My fear of them being taken is something that I can do something about, by following certain rules and being aware of surroundings and people. My love for the tv shows like forensic files, disappeared and all "cop shows" have made me even more paranoid but I have also learned a few things that probably will keep me and my kids safer.

After watching a show about child abductions, I decided to do something about it in our community. So, being the crazy mom I am, I called the Phoenix police department, Scottsdale police department and finally the FBI. To my surprise, the local police did not offer ANY help nor were they willing to even answer questions. They kept telling me that due to budget cuts they could not help, even though I told them repeatedly that I wanted to speak to someone to get some questions answered. No luck there.

To my surprise, the FBI was not only willing to talk to me but they were so helpful and willing to share information and ideas on how to obtain resources to help keep our children safer.

I decided to make it a focus in our practice to make child safety one of our goals this year so, throughout the year, we will have special events to help other crazy moms like me keep our babies safe.

Here is the scoop, I am currently speaking to the local FBI office and we will hopefully be hosting an event where an FBI agent comes to speak about....ta daaaa "Child Safety or Internet Safety" that is why we have the poll on my blog to decide which one we are going to do first. We will be inviting all the parents in our practice and we will also make it available for your friends and family as well as the community around us. We will also host an event after that where we will be handing out free fingerprint and DNA kits that you can keep with you in case of an emergency.

I am very excited about being able to do this but my hope and prayer is that no one EVER has to use them but if they do hopefully that will help bring a child back home to their parents safe.

Although I worry a lot about everything, my hope and trust is in the Lord, I am NOT perfect and I need to remind myself that He is in control and not me so, I keep this Bible verse on my desk as a reminder that I have to let go and LET GOD.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Philippians 4:6

We Love play dough!

I can not truly overcome all my fears, I can only pray and trust in Him.

Thanks for visiting! L

Flu season is here and we are fighting it...Are you?

2010-11-16T21:43:00.000-08:00

I knew Bennett was not feeling well when he was laying on my lap the other day...I hoped that maybe he was just sleepy but then last night it ALL began...sore throat, pulling ears, low grade fever...and I thought ....here we go !... Sure enough today was worse. I get soo stressed out when my babies are sick!! I always want to figure out a way to make them better right away. So, I do what every mom does when we are looking for something, yep...go to the internet and search what I can do to protect our family this winter season. I found this on cookinglight.com

I hope that everyone stays healthy this winter...loooove the holidays!

Food alone can’t protect against the common cold or flu, but experts agree that a diet rich in a variety of produce, whole grains, lean proteins, and low-fat dairy products―along with adequate sleep, moderate exercise, and minimal stress―contributes to a well-functioning immune system. Here are some key nutrients and recipes that will help increase the likelihood that you’ll fly through the winter months in good health.

Vitamin C

Choose citrus, like grapefruit, oranges, kumquats, tangerines, and clementines as well as canned tomatoes, chiles, or pineapple for vitamin C.

Tropical Citrus Compote

Ingredients

1/2 cup water
1/2 cup sugar
1 teaspoon grated lime rind
1 teaspoon grated orange rind
1 1/2 cups orange sections (about 3 oranges)
1 1/2 cups chopped peeled mango (about 1 mango)
1 1/2 cups chopped peeled papaya (about 1 papaya)
1 cup red grapefruit sections (about 2 grapefruit)

Preparation

1. Combine 1/2 cup water and sugar in a small saucepan; bring to a boil, stirring until sugar dissolves. Remove from heat; stir in rinds. Cool to room temperature. Strain sugar mixture through a fine sieve; discard solids.

2. Combine orange and remaining ingredients in a bowl. Add sugar mixture; toss gently.

Vitamin A

Pumpkin, butternut squash, and other deep-hued orange produce provide beta-carotene, which is converted in the body to vitamin A. The squash in this recipe is also packed with vitamin C.

Butternut Squash Gratin with Bleu Cheese and Sage

Ingredients

5 cups (3/4-inch) cubed peeled butternut squash (about 2 pounds)
1 (1 1/2-ounce) slice white bread
4 teaspoons olive oil, divided
2 cups thinly sliced onion
1 tablespoon chopped fresh sage
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
Cooking spray
1/2 cup (2 ounces) crumbled blue cheese

Preparation

1. Preheat oven to 400°.

2. Steam butternut squash, covered, 10 minutes or until tender.

3. Place bread in a food processor, and pulse 12 times or until coarse crumbs measure 1/2 cup. Transfer to a small bowl; add 2 teaspoons oil, and toss with a fork to combine.

4. Heat remaining 2 teaspoons oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add sliced onion to pan; saute 5 minutes or until tender, stirring occasionally. Transfer the onion mixture to a large bowl. Add butternut squash, chopped sage, salt, and black pepper to bowl, and toss gently to combine. Spoon squash mixture into an 11 x 7–inch baking dish coated with cooking spray. Bake at 400° for 20 minutes. Sprinkle crumbled blue cheese evenly over squash mixture, and sprinkle evenly with breadcrumb mixture. Bake an additional 10 minutes or until the cheese is melted and crumbs are golden brown.

When life is not fair

2010-11-10T22:27:00.000-08:00

I have seen my husband cry 3 times since we met. When his dad passed away, when one of his best friend's wife was diagnosed with breast cancer (5 months ago) and today, when her husband, his friend was diagnosed with colon cancer. What are the chances of a couple, two wonderful and I truly mean wonderful, loving people get diagnosed with cancer at the same time?

I just can not wrap my head around the thought of them not being around for their 3 children, it makes me sick to my stomach. They are fighting the fight of their life and for their life and I hope and I pray and ask the Lord from the bottom of my heart to let them win because the world is better and life is better for those who know them with them in it.

My mom always told me, life is not fair...and it is not.... but, we are here and it is the way that we decide to live our lives that will make us or break us. I know for our friends, probably this will make their love for each other grow even more. For us, a good reminder of how precious and fragile life is.

So, tonight would you please say a prayer for our friends D & B. Kiss your hubby, tell him you love him and appreciate him and love on your babies a little more...because you don't know what tomorrow may bring.

I HATE to LOVE the United States of America

2010-10-31T16:32:00.000-07:00

I hate to be wrong and I don't like to admit it. It takes A LOT...more than a few minutes and ALMOST a shot of tequila, for me to swallow my pride and admit...mostly to my husband when I am wrong. He of course, loves it. I am sure everyone who reads this blog would know...women are always right. :)

Most of you know I was born in Mexico. I grew up with a love/ hate feeling towards the United States...I loved to visit, I loved shopping, I loved that everything was organized and clean, I admired the love that Americans had for their country and the pride they felt.

At the same time, I hated that "they" always won at everything, they were first at everything and I hated that I felt they thought they were better than everyone else in the world.

When I moved to the US to go to school, because of course they have the best dental schools in the world, I thought to myself, I will train there and learn as much as I can, be as good as I can be and go back home. Little did I know, God had different plans for me!!

After moving here, I began to learn more about this country, Greg and I love history and like to read a lot (not lately) but, learning about this country, how it was founded and its principles is an eye opener. I absolutely fell in love with it. Being an "outsider" I think I can understand better why people hate it. People hate the US because it is a prosperous nation, blessed by God. They hate it because it is a still a democracy...people do have freedom, unlike many countries in the world, including Mexico. It is truly the land of opportunity.

Most Americans are very hard working people and they are the most giving nation in the world. Giving their sons and daughters to fight for the freedom of men and women around the world, giving for every cause possible, being the first in any tragedy, anywhere in the world to lend a hand. I remember the earthquake that destroyed Mexico City in the 80's and I remember seeing the airplanes coming from the US carrying food, water, search and rescue specialists with their dogs and more and you know what every package of food said? "Donated by the people of the United States".....WOW....

I became a citizen a few years ago, the ceremony was emotional and many people shared their love and thankfulness to this country. I was moved to tears. I still felt funny putting my hand on my heart when they played the national anthem. After I had Bennett, I felt like I was officially, an American. That does not mean that I don't love Mexico or that I am not proud of my Hispanic heritage, I am and I will absolutely want my boys to love their heritage as well.

People should feel proud of being Americans, there is no country like this in the world. No apologies!! The freedom that we have is absolutely amazing and many paid with their lives for it. When I watch the news and read about how the government wants to take some of our freedoms away, it scares me. I want my boys to enjoy the same freedoms and not have to pay for our complacency. This is a country that is worth fighting for, so please vote this November 2nd, this general election is so important to the future of this country. If you don't know how to vote or have questions about where candidates stand visit www.azvoterguide.com for a non-partisan guide to vote.

I can not wait for my boys to be older so we can stand together and place our hands over our hearts when the Star Spangled Banner is played.

I hate to say it...but, I was wrong. America is a great country...and I LOVE IT.

I can honestly say, I LOVE to LOVE the United States of America.

How much pain can you endure?

2010-10-24T23:14:00.000-07:00

Today, was a good day at church. The worship was fantastic and the sermon full of wisdom and good advice. Sadly, we learned about 2 church families that had unexpected deaths this week. One of those families is people I know from choir. Over the time that I have known them, I have seen them endure pain and financial struggles that I wish no one would have to go through and now a death from a terrible accident.

I have never had to endure a lot of pain in my life. I had a wonderful family growing up and I was always able to achieve my goals with little dissapointment. I lost an aunt that I loved dearly and I lost 2 babies. I never held my babies because my pregnancies ended early and suddenly but I still cried, my heart was still broken but in my sadness, I was still able to praise God and say, "Your will, not mine". I often wonder if I lost one of my boys or my husband, if I would still be able to praise God. I don't know and it scares me to even think about it.

Seeing this family go through all these difficult times is hard, I wonder ...how much pain they can endure? I don't question God... but I just don't understand why? I guess I will never know because I am not God, I don't know His will or the "Big Picture" in their lives. I do know that the only thing that has gotten this family through is their unwavering faith in God.

As I am writing this and reflecting on what was said in church this morning I guess I am answering my own question... Why? why do they have to endure all this pain? For the rest of us, to learn to be thankful for what we have, to remind us that God is in control, not us and at least for me to continue to try to stay close to the Lord.

When I was trying to put B to sleep this evening, he began to cry and throw a tantrum...I held him and tickled him and I thought to myself...Thank you Lord that I get to put my son to sleep and kiss him good night and sing him a lullaby. After he fell asleep I prayed for the family that won't be able to do that again and I prayed that we as a family don't let ourselves get so worked up about schedules and deadlines and every other thing that distracts us from what is truly important.

Torture

2010-10-06T00:20:00.000-07:00

As I have said before, I LOOVE, talking to other moms. I don't have a life outside work and my family which is fine with me...not complaining here. But, when I talk to moms about everyday things, life, kids, husbands and such, its like going to Starbucks, getting my Tall Extra Dry Capuccino and chatting with a girlfriend. Hence, my running late all the time with my schedule.

I think I have posted a few of my obsessions...not hobbies, I call them obsessions because that is what they are, I go crazy when I have time to do a "small project" ( I won't define "small project" for lack of ~~time~~ space but lets just say its not small : 0 ) One of my obsessions is... I don't even know what to call it...Stamping? sounds simple and straight forward right? well let me tell YOU it is NOT.

Today, JDC was in the office for her daughter's appointment and of course SHE HAS to tell me about this blog.... http://inkingidaho.blogspot.com (I am posting it so I can pass on the torture to someone else) We are sharing with each other about things we do and we find out, we are very much alike. We are both CRAZY....Yes, crazy obsessed with "projects" we never get to do.

We want to do EVERYTHING and we simply don't. Why you ask? Simple.... GUILT....Mother's guilt. If I am not doing something for my kids or with my kids...ITS WRONG!!!! I am a bad mom.... AH it kills me!

Back to my story. Of course as soon as the boys go down, what do I do? Instead of working on my other 100 projects for the office. I decide to torture myself, I go into this blog and look at all this stuff that I would love to make....I am thinking I am going to buy these tutorials so I can make my own Christmas cards or Birthday cards....or this or that for my office. WHO AM I KIDDING??? No one, I just want to torture myself.

I will probably buy a tutorial, then call my Stampin' Up favorite person Lorri Heiling (http://stampingaddict.blogspot.com/) and place a huge order so that I have everything I need to make whatever I decide to do when I have time. Hilarious...when I have time.

There is no moral to this story...the feel good part about this story is:

There are other moms as crazy as I am which...makes me feel better about myself
There are other moms that feel the same mother's guilt regardless of them being a stay at home mom or a working mom like me and that also makes me feel better about myself
I am not alone...one way or another we are all the same. Sharing is what matters. We are all in this boat together and although we might be very different we all go through similar challenges in our family life and when you know you are not alone or the only one feeling a certain way....IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER

So... I am feeling better. My "play room" will continue to be a "dumping ground" for my projects for a while but I am not alone.

A friend recently asked me if I was getting enough sleep and I said of course not!! I have a 4 month old! She smiled and said that moms get their sleep when they are in heaven after their job is done. Mmmmm, I don't think so, instead of sleeping I probably will be chasing God, asking questions about EVERYTHING... Likely, He will ask one of his angels to please send me back to earth as soon as possible.

One thing is for sure, come hell or high water, I am baking this weekend. Of course, after the boys go down for naps!

Traveling...Torture or Fun.

2010-10-02T20:50:00.000-07:00

I love to travel. I inherited the love for traveling from my dad. I remember him coming back from his adventures in exotic places and just listening to him in awe! He would start the story when we dropped him off at the airport and end it right before we picked him up.

My "exotic" travel at this time includes California and Iowa. Yes, pretty exotic.! Over time, we have made some adjustments and this last trip was....let's just say... better. There are some great products out there that make life easier when you travel ... I always say: "Why didn't I think of that?!"

My Travel Necessities:

1)Backpacks
Hands are free and can hold hands, bottles, suitcases...and of course we check our suitcases.

2) Baby Bjorn
They used to be bulky and hot but the new one is easy to put on and not hot at all. pretty cool!

3) Go Go Baby Z
We placed Bennett's car seat on it and wheeled him around everywhere and he thought he was the coolest kid in the airport! It is safe, he was contained and the best part was...we didn't have to chase him all over the airport or worry about him laying on the floor! (mom is ....kind of a germaphobe) Which brings me to my next necessity....A CAR SEAT in the airplane.

Greg pulling Bennett while he is still sleeping.

4) Car seat in the plane
No more pulling Bennett from under the seat and no more grabbing other passenger's stuff. They are comfortable and used to their car seat so they don't mind it as much.
Just working on something to prevent him from kicking the person in front of him. :)

5) And the greatest invention from Apple yet....

The iPad

Movies, Games, Music, Books and more, ...super light and easy to carry. TOTALLY WORTH THE MONEY. The best baby sitter in the whole entire world, I NEVER leave home without it.

5)Pronto Changing Station
This is the greatest changing station, I just had to post the link because it is just such a great product. I just laid it in the seat next to me and changed diapers. Check it out it is awesome.
http://www.skiphop.com/product/202000.html

6)Clorox Wipes

Yes, I am a germaphobe, I don't think there is anything wrong with it. :) I carry clorox wipes in a ziploc bag and clean tables, chairs, wipe around my seat in the airplane and a few other things.

SO, now when I travel and get the dirty looks when people see me coming in the plane with 2 kids, I just smile and say I have my IPad!! and I apologize to the people around me ahead of time.

Because I am so attached to my IPad and think every parent with children under 5 should have one, we have a contest for one in our facebook page. Sooo, if you don't have one yet or have one but need another one, go on our facebook page and enter the drawing. Trust me you will love it.

So, traveling.. torture or fun? Mmmmmmmm.......Both!

What I have learned as the mom of a 2 year old...

2010-09-15T14:05:00.000-07:00

Bennett...climbing, Brock on the baby bjorn...screaming and mommy having a panic attack...making waffles!

MY TOP 5:

1. NEVER JUDGE

2. NEVER say never

3. SOMETHING is better than nothing

4. I AM NOT nor will I ever be good enough

5. Learn from your mistakes AND MOVE OOON!

1. NEVER JUDGE....WHY?

Simple, because you will be judged. NO more judging people from the contents of their shopping cart or the behavior of their children.

The waffle story. Every time I saw people buying frozen waffles I rolled my eyes, and thought to myself; what is the matter with these people?

The other day, I tried to make waffles, Brock was screaming for attention, Bennett was climbing on the chairs and I was trying to make waffles. I put Brock on the baby bjorn, and thought, no problem, I can do this. After about 30 minutes and a huge mess, Bennett was eating waffles and I was exhausted already. Will I buy frozen waffles? No, BUT I will only make them if Greg is here.

2. NEVER SAY NEVER..... WHY?

Because everything I said I would never do with my kids, I have already done...and if I haven't it is only a matter of time until I do. ie, using electronics as a babysitter....among other things that I am too embarrassed to admit.

3. SOMETHING is better than nothing

Some sleep is better than none, your children eating something good for them is better than nothing...Bennett cooperating for some of his exercises in gym class is better than no cooperation at all. AND SO ON....

4. I AM NOT NOR WILL I EVER BE PERFECT

I think this is true for all moms...if not, I guess there are some that are actually perfect!

We are all hard on ourselves. If the kids get sick,...I should have been more careful, if they don't do well in school, I should have spent more time with homework...if they get in trouble...it's our fault. If they get cavities...I don't floss enough... If, if, if...could have, should have, would have.

BUT do we ever give ourselves any credit for ALL the things we do right? The answer is NO, we don't. That's okay, at least it keeps me trying.

5.Learn from your mistakes and MOVE OOON!

Need I say more? Why do I punish myself ? Is it just me?

I am sure I have a lot more to learn, that is what life is about...and I can't wait to find out.

Thanks for reading and sharing....

I just need more time...

2010-09-11T23:47:00.000-07:00

My sister decorated this cake for Bennett's second birthday while my mom, Greg, my brother in law and I made the small cakes with the animals on top. It was fun but a lot of work.

My mom working on the little piggies

The kitchen a complete mess!!!

I am always looking for "stuff" to do, its kind of scary because when I find something I want to do, I go a little crazy.

No, not a little crazy I go super crazy! Greg just smiles when I get into my "zone" and I LOVE that he lets me do what I want and even helps me sometimes.

I love to bake, cook, read, make jewelry and then bake some more. Luckily, my sister and mom love baking as much as I do. My mom is a great cook, anything she makes is awesome...she is a natural in the kitchen. She doesn't even need a recipe. Growing up my mom taught us how to bake the "perfect pie crust", all kinds of pies and cakes and of course as good mexicans, how to make flour tortillas.

As the holidays are approaching, I am looking forward to our baking sessions...I hope my boys are like their dad and get into it with me, even if its only for a few years and build memories. After all, when the people we love are gone that is all we have, the memories.

I am kind of getting interested on making my own lip balm...crazy....I know, I just love to try new things...I JUST NEED MORE TIME!!! Oh my, talking about time, its past midnight, I have to get up early tomorrow to go to church, I joined the choir. I am soo excited....I love to worship.

Anyway, anybody have a good recipe for lipbalm? :)

Brock is already 3 months

2010-09-05T00:34:00.000-07:00

Time flies!! Brock is 3 months old already, where has time gone. I feel I just had him!!! Babies are so sweeet and delicious!

Gerda Hale

2010-09-01T23:23:00.000-07:00

Bennett and Grandma Evelyn

Greg's grandmother passed away this week, I truly did not think that I was going to be sad about it but, I am. She was a very interesting person and NOT your typical grandma. No baking cookies, no loving ways...very direct, stubborn, a little selfish...and more. But, she knew how to have fun. When I met her, Greg and I had just gotten married and were living in Connecticut, she was in her 80's and she was hard to keep up with. Right about 5 o'clock she would tell Greg, "Gregory, its cocktail time, fix me a stiff drink" , with a still strong German accent, she would travel with a bottle of Canadian Whisky, unbelievable, as I am writing this, I am just laughing with Greg.... I don't think either of my grandmothers ever had an alcoholic drink so to me, that was SHOCKING!

She was born in Berlin, Germany to a jewish dad and a "gentile" mom, grew up spoiled until the II World War began. As the war began, her parents sent her to London, where she was supposed to live with a family who would take care of her but, instead they treated her as their maid. She met who would be grandpa Kurt and she had Evelyn (Greg's mom) during the war. The stories she told were amazing...her dad and brother had been taken to concentration camps and her mom bought their way out paying the guards. Then, her parents fled to Belgium where her mom worked (as she was not jewish) and her husband hid from the German army. Granny got on a ship with Evelyn and Grandpa Kurt and came to the US.

I think her life was hard starting out and I those events made her who she became. Although I was never close to her, I will miss her, I have Greg and my boys because of her and I will forever be thankful. We saw her in Iowa a few weeks ago and she told me..."I can't believe it...your boys are adopted, they are too big and blonde and could not be yours, you are too small" . :) I just smiled and said to her well, they got your blue eyes and she didn't say anything else...I am so glad that she got to meet my two boys, she was thrilled.

We spoke to her 2 weeks ago and she said goodbye, that was sooo said but, she was ok with it. She said "I'm done this is no way to live, I have had a good life" she was 90. I began to cry and I thanked her for everything she did for us, I told her I loved her although I hesitated but then I realized I was being honest...I do love her. I had Bennett get on the phone and tell her "I love you granny" and then he went on telling her about the whales and the sharks.

I will miss her, she was special, in a different kind of way but, still special. Rest in peace Granny, we will miss you.

Life could not be any sweeter

2010-08-31T00:00:00.000-07:00

Wearing Bennett's Bruce the shark hat...tickling him to get a "happy picture" in the happiest place on earth! Bennett's face all day! Dad is more excited about the parade than Bennett.

Baby Brock...sweet as pie! More like daddy

Okay, I didn't think this was going to be so hard...2 babies makes a HUGE difference. Lots of moms warned me....THEY WERE RIGHT! I have to admit...I AM LOVING IT! Its crazy but I have already asked Greg...can we have another one? He looked at me and with a serious look in his face and he said.."NO" ..... It will be interesting to see what happens. I just feel that I am not done...and if I don't have another one, will I always regret it? or will I get over it? Any thoughts on that ladies?

We have not taken any vacation since Bennett was born so, we took a week off and we headed to where all Phoenicians go in the summer...of course, California. It is such a beautiful state, the weather is incredible and I LOVE the ocean. We took the boys to Disney and Sea World. It was a memorable time, Bennett had no interest in taking pictures with Buzz Lightyear who is his hero, no interest in Mickey Mouse who he loves to watch...No interest in riding any rides...I was just shocked with him not wanting to do anything. I told my sister and she said, that does not surprise me, he is just like you! I had to take a moment to think about this and I came to the conclusion that she is right!!! I was just like that as a little girl!! I will never admit this to her, I am sure she does not read my blog anyway....

The best part of this whole story was how it started for me... before going inside the park I had changed 3 diapers, breastfed on the floor outside Disney and chased Bennett who had no shoes on while I was trying to feed Brock, really fun!!. UNFORGETTABLE!

Greg and I had about 3 hours one afternoon where both boys were taking a nap and we just sat down and had a long talk sitting by the ocean in Seaport Village. Dreaming, planning, hoping and praying for a beautiful life with our boys. It was Awesome! I love my husband, just for putting up with me...and many other reasons. My dad told me one day "sweetie, you will marry a saint or a general" he was right, I was lucky enough to marry a saint. Life could not be any sweeter.

My first two weeks at work

2010-07-26T21:20:00.000-07:00

Well, I made it through my first two weeks at work...barely. I must admit it was a struggle to leave my babies! I don't know why but I found it harder to go back to work this time. Today was especially hard but, once I get to the office and see my kiddos over there it is much easier. I feel like I have relationships with moms and their babies and it makes me happy.

I have started to take a day off a week, last wednesday when I was home and Bennett woke up, I went to his bedroom and I said "Good morning sunshine!" to what he replied "Hi mama, I am so happy" I think it was because I was there and not already gone! it made me happy and sad...at the same time, I am glad though that I am able to spend a whole day during the week with my boys.

This weekend we had our special event at the ballpark. We got to see the Diamondbacks against the Giants...it was a lot of fun and I think the kids enjoyed it... I think....I will post some pictures this week. Next time, I will do things a little different...I think the parents enjoyed the game and the kids just enjoyed seeing Baxter and eating hot dogs! Ha Ha

Going back to work....

2010-07-11T21:31:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is my official first day back and I am not ready. I didn't expect to feel this way but I am really struggling. When I had Bennett he seemed to not need me as much, he was more comfortable laying in his crib, than being held and it was easier for me to not feel so guilty leaving him. Brock loves to be held by anyone but most of the time, he will only want me. I never had that with Bennett so, I don't know if he is ready for me to go back to work.

I am sad...I guess every working mom goes through this, I am sure everyone cries going back to work. I know I probably will. We shall see how he does and go from there, I may have to make adjustments to my schedule. I love my job and my kiddos at work but my boys are my life.

Bennett is doing really good with Brock, he told me this afternoon that he loves his baby brother, I said to him, I hope you feel the same way when you are 15...to what Greg replied..."he won't"...he knows, he has 2 brothers. :)

Although Bennett is doing great, there are a couple of things we are having issues with, the pacifier and the bottle...Bennett would not take a pacifier after he was 6-8 months old and now, we wants them AGAIN! I don't want to make a big deal and tell him that he can't have them and make him feel like Brock can and he can't. He asks for milk all the time and wants the paci...its kind of funny really because he has asked me to hold him to sleep a few times when I am holding Brock... I am kind of liking that since he is not a cuddly baby but, hopefully we will get over this soon.

In everything give thanks...

2010-07-05T17:55:00.000-07:00

After we got home, I felt pretty good...a week after I was back in the hospital with complications...I have to honestly say, I was scared and felt so sad to not be able to take care of my boys for 4 days while I was recovering from surgery...again!

3 weeks later, Bennett was in the hospital with a gastrointestinal virus. My WORST nightmare, what a feeling of desperation to want to make your baby feel better and not be able to. We both recovered and were back home after a few days...Praise God!

In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus. I Th 5:18
I always heard it from my parents...be thankful for everything and I am.

I am thankful for what happened because it reminded me of how fragile life can be and that only God has control, not me. I can't make my baby feel better, no matter what I do. I am thankful to God for helping me get through it and providing a loving family that is there for me.

I wish everyone had the support of family, it makes things so much easier!

Welcome Home My Sweet, Sweet Love...Brock

2010-06-27T19:04:00.000-07:00

I thought that I would have all the time in the world to write in my blog after the baby was born...silly me! God had different plans for us...

The C-section went as planned, Greg and I got to the hospital and we were able to take some pictures before we went into surgery, we had time to talk a bit and just enjoy eachother's company before Brock came.

May 28th 2010, Brock came out at 11:57 am, screaming...the sweetest noise in my ears! Everything went well and I was able to look at him soon after he came out...I was feeling pretty good, nauseous the rest of the day but other than that...no complaints. We struggled a little with feeding but by the time we left the hospital we were doing better.

Bennett was thrilled to meet his brother and was excited about the present Brock had brought for him.

The best part about my stay at the hospital was the people who took care of me, my doctor was awesome and the nurses!!! just as awesome. I was lucky enough to have all these familiar faces taking care of me...almost every day when a new nurse came in, I would say....I know you....and of course I did, they were the moms of some of my patients!!!

So, it was really wonderful to have people that I know and that I like and that are sweet, kind and compassionate taking great care of us... so thank you Cathy, Anita and Jen...and all the other "moms/nurses" that were working and took the time to come say hi...I sooo thank you...

I tell you, not only was I spoiled by these wonderful ladies that work there but also, one of our "moms" actually took the time to come to the hospital and take some very very special pictures while Brock and I were still in the hospital...she did a fabulous job and as I told her these pictures are so special...I will forever be thankful...thank you Susan!!! I will post her info once she is ready just in case anyone is interested in having some pictures taken at the hospital!!

Brock is a very good baby, only cries when he is hungry or dirty...I am so glad he is here. I just want to hold him and love him. I feel so blessed.

My Prayer for Brock

2010-05-27T09:40:00.000-07:00

I have always believed in prayer...so as we get ready to have another baby...I want to share my prayer for Brock with you...I am emotional...sentimental...its the hormones probably....I know, I know....but I also trust in the Lord with all my heart and pray this prayer in my heart for Brock.

Dear Lord,
Please hold Brock in your hands as he is born, guide the surgeons hands and bring him to this world completely healthy. Fill him with your joy throughout his life.

Give Brock a strong heart that relies only in You. Give him a kind and compassionate heart that is in tune with Your heart...and that NOTHING.....NOTHING ever makes him turn away from you.
May Brock love you and always keep you as a strong presence in his life. Protect him his whole life and may he be found a good and faithful servant to you always.

I love you Lord and I thank you for the opportunity and incredible blessing of allowing me to be his mommy, give me patience, immeasureable love, kindness, tenderness and everything he will need from me to guide him. Help me be a good example for him and always let him know that I love him regardless of any circumstance.
Amen.

I made it to 38 weeks!! and didn't think I would!

2010-05-22T13:33:00.000-07:00

Neither my doctor nor I thought I would make it to 38 weeks...I am sitting at home, eating cherries and enjoying my baby and my hubby. I am so thankful I have been able to carry this baby so far without any complications or very few problems I should say...God is good!!
I am off next week, doctor's orders...I am bummed really because I think the week would go by much faster for me...but I need to listen...just like I tell Bennett.

I got lots of good advice from my friends (moms of patients) this last week...so, I am trying to do a few of those things...one of them said, You have your over night bag ready right? and I said...aaaaah...No? and it is still not ready but I will work on it this weekend.
Another idea was to get my other car seat ready and put a baby in it so Bennett can start to get used to it...great idea...I'm doing that this weekend as well...I also got a few things for the baby...I think I am ready....right?

Any advice, suggestions????

I am excited, hopeful, joyful, a little nervous...and honestly a little scared... Greg just said he is ready to move on to the next stage...and I said what do you mean the next stage? and he said...You not being pregnant... I wonder why? :)

Please pray that everything goes well and we don't have any complications, that God leads the surgeons hands and that next friday we have a healthy baby.

Will update you often!!!

Seriously....if you have any suggestions or advice.. PLEASE tell me...you think you are ready and then you ARE NOT!

Are my patients awesome or what???

2010-05-17T14:20:00.000-07:00

Every single day, I get a card, flowers, a gift...a word of encouragement, even prayers from my patients. I just can't thank everyone enough, I truly feel that I don't deserve it!! It just means so much to me that all my patients and their moms even think about us...being so busy!!!

I can only say WOW and thank you! You make me want to come to work everyday and always do my best, even today when I am having a lot of contractions...the doctor sent me home but I am just finishing up some stuff!!!

Oh! yes...there is one more thing I can say...I love you too!!!

I will have to post a picture of my flowers that I got from one of my little girls...if it is posted I didn't go into labor if I don't...I will be sending an announcement soon... :)
Much much love....to you!

Mother's Day

2010-05-16T17:08:00.000-07:00

Oh wow!! Mother's Day came and went and here I am just now taking the time to write about it. "My day" was fabulous, Greg wanted to make Eggs Benedict for my mom, my sister and I...he did and they were great, we sat outside and watched the kids play. It was a lovely day!!! I love my hubby, he is the best husband in the world!

As I said before, Mother's Day has a new meaning to me...not only because now I am a mom and I understand my mom more and better but because I see the responsibility I have raising a child!!

I learned a lot from my mom; cook, bake, clean, work hard, respect others and much much more but, what still amazes me about my mom was her commitment to be a good wife and set a good example for us kids although I know sometimes she was in diagreement with my dad, she supported him and stood by him.

I still think about that today... and its a great example to follow...I think though, Greg and I talk a lot and we are on the same page with most things which makes it easier for me...

My parents have a great marriage still today, 45 years strong...I love seeing them hug and kiss, listen to Toni Bennett and smile at eachother. What an example of love and commitment.

So, to the point...I am committed to set a good example for my boys, be loving, supportive and stand by my husband...be a great mother guiding them as best as I can...and I pray everyday that God will help me achieve just that.

I don't know if you heard about the tragedy at The University of Virginia...Yeardley Love a senior, was beaten to death by her boyfriend. Both were Lacrosse players...tragic in every sense of the word, not only for the mother who lost her daughter (her dad passed away in 1993) but for the parents of her boyfriend who killed her.

I read an interview of his mom and she said "As a mother I never expected to be in a situation like this"...I can only imagine the questions she asks herself since that tragic day...was it my fault, should I have done something different when I was raising my son....what did I do wrong? Only God knows, she could have been the perfect mother. I don't know, its just a reminder again of the great responsibility we have.

So, as I think about celebrating Mother's Day, I also think about this great responsibility to raise responsible adults that treasure life and that would never think about hurting anyone.

I could go on writing about this but, I wont...its too sad. You can google it and read the whole story.

26 days and Counting...

2010-05-02T16:21:00.001-07:00

First picture ever of Baby Libby #2 after the embryo transfer

4D picture at 30 weeks

Went to a massage at AMOMI, the only physician supervised spa for pregnant women and Babyshots photography was there taking pictures...for free!!!

I looked awful but I thought, oh well...why not remember how I looked...not that sometimes I think.... why remember how I look??? :)

The last few weeks of my pregnancies have always been difficult...I can't sleep, I can't breathe, heartburn...swollen ankles, swollen everything!!!!...going to the bathroom every hour...on the hour....Must be the same for everyone!

BUT...what a feeling.... helping God create a human being...your own son or daughter...

I almost feel like I am complaining but, I am not...I am happy and just can not wait to meet him, what a gift for women to do this!

Time flies and now I am waiting to meet my baby....then you blink and they are talking to you saying "Need to listen..No!" (Bennett)

Working is good for me, it allows me to concentrate on my patients and not think about my struggles...plus I just love seeing the kiddos and watching them grow! Last week one of my patients brought my flowers...another one made me a book on her computer....how can you not love working with children!!!!. They make you feel special and loved....and the feeling is mutual they are all special and loved!

Any ideas for swollen ankles? or should I say cankles, elephant ankles? :)

Gearing up for Mother's Day!

2010-04-25T13:40:00.001-07:00

Mother's Day has a new meaning to me...not so much because I am a mom now but because now I appreciate my mom's hard work and sacrifice a bit more. I can understand the worries of everyday life that no one thinks about BUT a mom.

At work, I understand the "crazy moms" more and better because I have officially become one of them!!!

One of the great things about my "job" is talking to moms...I learn soo much...women in general are amazing...how do you do what you do and find time for MORE? How do many get through delivering a baby the MacGyver way and not think about it twice....BLOWS ME AWAY!!!! Could men do this? NO WAY!!!

As we approach Mothers day...I absolutely want to make it a point to celebrate moms in our office...just because moms are....awesome! So, the whole week leading to Mother's Day we have special little treats for moms...the whole week whether their kiddos have an appointment or not...so come by and let us spoil you just a bit...

EARTH DAY

2010-04-23T11:40:00.000-07:00

Mount St. Helen pictures from USDA Forest Services

I wonder how many people realized it was Earth Day sometime last week...what is Earth Day anyway? So, I did what everone else does and I went online and typed "What is E.D"?

Here is what I came up with:
Established in March 1970, "a global holiday to celebrate the wonder of life in our planet"...The wonder of life in our planet...

I went on with my search and found another website that says "the world is in greater peril than ever and that climate change is the "greatest challenge of our time" and it blames humankind for it.

Also found that most of the research was biased and manipulated...the evidence that does exist does not justify the social, economic cost of reducing CO2 emissions.

So, my questions are:
Are we celebrating the wonder of this planet?
No, I don't think we are...do we ever stop and think why we recycle...don't use or try not to use paper towels...etc? I don't, maybe you do... When I see a beautiful animal, a beautiful sunset, a beautiful flower I do think...WOW!!! there is a God who created this....Am I celebrating the wonder of life on this planet when I think that....I don't know.

Is the world in greater peril than ever and is humankind to blame?
No, I think we would think too much of ourselves to remotely think that anything that we do can have an impact...I mean a real impact on our planet...

For instance, when Mount St. Helen erupted in WA. Its cloud covered the earth ..."THE EARTH" in 15 days, the blast was 400 times more powerful than the atomic bomb that leveled Hiroshima. It blew down enough trees to build 300,000 two-bedroom homes. Nearly 7,000 big game animals (deer, elk and bear) perished.
Did we cause Mt. St. Helen to erupt? No.....Can humankind cause this kind of disaster from CO2 emissions....Come on!!!...Rest my case....

Is this all false and a political platform to make a lot of money for some?
Possible...

So, should we celebrate Earth Day? Yes, absolutely we should...for what it is....Celebrating the wonder of life on this planet...not throwing away my son's crayons for ones that have no petroleum in them...among other crazy things like that...

I think its about being a responsible adult and doing what is right...teaching our children to appreciate and respect others and our differences, nature, animals and to not be wasteful of the resources we have been given but, preserving them for others to enjoy. So, to me it boils down to responsibility...to teach our children to do what is right....Isn't that what we are supposed to do anyway?

I am sorry if many disagree, I realize this is a touchy subject...I welcome any comments...just don't be mad...:)

EASTER SUNDAY

2010-04-05T22:36:00.000-07:00

Bennett 10 minutes old!

Bennett in his Easter egg hunt!!

Getting ready and making a big mess!!!

Easter Sunday is an incredibly special day for me....I will explain....

This year was the first year Bennett got to have an Easter egg hunt. I did not expect him to be into it but...HE WAS!!! So, we decorated 3 eggs..it took about 10 minutes and we made a big old mess...then on Sunday, he had fun finding eggs in the backyard with his cousin Ian.

I must admit that I did put jelly beans on the plastic eggs (3 jelly beans on each), luckily, he had no interest in them !!! Daddy and Mommy ate them all!!! (ONLY ON EASTER!!!) ....Confession....Greg and I love jelly beans....is that awful or what??? this is classified information!! ok???? and we only eat them on special days...like Easter! The rest of the eggs had cars and aliens....which he is now getting into....

I want to make all these celebrations "special" for him. I want him to have great memories of growing up in a loving home. I think we all love to think back about the "old days" and remember fun times, loved ones and those little things that make us who we are. I hope someday he will be able to do the same with his own kids...and remember!

I Love Easter Sunday because we celebrate Jesus' resurrection and the meaning that has in our lives. The sacrifice of love for us although we don't deserve it. God is so merciful!!!

My Bennett was born Easter Sunday...it was a very difficult and scary delivery...I was out for almost 2 days and did not get to hold him because I was so sick... but, what an incredible gift and just like the resurrection is...a new beginning...a new beginning as a mom...a dad....a family!! I am sooo grateful for the incredible opportunity to be a mom and I look forward to life with my boys...the 3 of them....Bennett, dad and baby Brock...coming end of May...

Do you feel so blessed to be a mom? scared like me sometimes? what gets you through?

Anyway, thanks for reading...this is my therapy before going to bed... :)

Jesus is Risen.......He is Risen Indeed!!!...this is what gets me through!

Anonymous Wisdom

2010-03-15T17:45:00.000-07:00

I received an email from a parent of one of our patients and wanted to share these "words of wisdom" with everyone else.

"...And as to the Cares, they are chiefly what attend the bringing up of children; and I would ask any Man or Woman who has experienced it, if they are not the most delightful Cares in the World..."-Benjamin Franklin: Collected Works, Lemay, ed. (249) Your work, your service and dedication to doing good is helping to create the bliss that comes with raising these "delightful Cares" and is one more swatch of fabric that makes our community so wonderful. Do your best at all times. Be good, kind and polite to others at all times. Be truthful at all times even if it hurts sometimes. Do unto others as you would have done to you."

Thank you for those wonderful words of wisdom!

Is there a Happy Medium??

2010-03-14T20:43:00.000-07:00

Do you ever wonder...how can I be a better mom, better wife, better daughter...better everything???

Growing up I never remember thinking, "I want to be a mom", I remember thinking I want to be a doctor like my dad... as I got older and "wiser" I began to feel the NEED to be a mom. I struggled through infertility for almost 5 years and thought I would never have my own baby.. I thought "God has a plan" and although I cried myself to sleep many nights I trusted that God knew better than me...and He did!!

I decided to concentrate on my "other love" WORK... I got such joy and fulfillment from seeing my "babies" at the office that it helped me get through my struggle with infertility...its truly amazing the love that you get from children...

When I finally was able to conceive through IVF and I had Bennett...I thought....Oh my...what am I going to do now? I am blessed because my parents moved to Arizona and help me care for him...(which was in God's timing...not mine) ...but, many times I think, how can I be a better mom to Bennett and not feel guilty about working...I think all women that work feel like I do...so how do you find a happy medium?

Many of my friends that stay at home tell me, "I wish I had a job, I wish I was more accomplished, I wish I had a career like you" and I tell them I am jealous of them....I am in a way...but, I also love what I do....so, again how do you find a happy medium??

I guess there is no happy medium...and I can only speak for myself, I do know, by talking to "moms" at the office...we give 100% when we are at home with our kids, our husbands, our parents...and we give 100% when we work...or at least try! or die trying :)

Women are amazing...they find strength and courage where there is none to keep going, so, we do that...keep going!

This is therapeutic to me...please share with me....I would love to hear from other moms...

Why Blog?

2010-03-08T20:07:00.000-08:00

Why Blog?....there are many things about my job that I love...I love meeting my patients and seeing them grow...seeing the changes they go through and making a positive impact in their lives...they amaze me everyday and I am thankful for the opportunity to provide care for them.

Another thing about my job that I have found to be extremely rewarding, is the relationships I have been able to build with the "moms"... I have learned a lot from them, laughed, cried...prayed for and been prayed for and it was something that I just never expected...I enjoy that just as much as I enjoy the kiddos...

Soooo....because I enjoy moms so much and I dont get to spend enough time with them, I thought...well, why not reach out and share thoughts, feelings...ideas....about being a mom...juggling life, children, husbands....work and more...so thank you for visiting, I will at least try to blog once a week...Blessings!!! Dr.L